I think anytime you go through an expansion process, there are some days/weeks/months/years of a kind of void space. Everything gets very quiet for awhile. It feels a bit like a depression and I think that’s normal, as the old parts of you die off. I’ve been doing a lot of observing of this process the last several days. It’s a whole lot of wtf mixed in with utter stillness. When one travels the ethers, coming back can feel strange. The contrast between a place that feels familiar and then coming back to this hellscape. So I do a lot of remembering of pieces and listening to the reminders that my guidance Beings like to give me.
I have a gift of knowing things. Some call it claircognizance. That lightning bolt of just knowing something with no evidence. I’ve read that it is one of the hardest to have because, and I can attest to this, you feel like you’re insane. It has taken many years of things happening, then looking back on the flash of knowing that came previous to the event, and learning to trust it more when it actually happens. Being completely gaslit my entire life has not helped at all. It comes from a different space than the logical brain. Like an envelope of information just sort of busts open and settles down in my belly. The truth of things always finds me, things people have done, confirmations of that information. I never go looking, I usually do not want to know, but it doesn’t matter. I always find out.
It’s funny how things bubble up. I pay special attention to those stray fragments of memory that come to say hello out of nowhere. Those are usually communication from Guidance. This morning, I sat under a dark sky, while the dogs did their business. Midas, my large familiar is about to turn one and I’ve come to realize he is not what he seems. Anyone who has met him can attest to this. I was watching him and then there was a flash.
It was early 2015, right before I began to drop into spontaneous trance fairly often and started having visions during the day. I had decided to visit a new age shop, for lack of a better descriptor. They had an older woman at the front of the store who offered mini readings. When I walked in, she stopped what she was doing and made a big deal about “all my colors.” I remember not having a single clue what she was talking about. She could obviously see something around me. I ended up doing a reading with her and I cannot remember most of it, but there was something about my art touching the world. I had not shared with her that I was an artist.
I made an appointment to see her in her own space not long after and to get bodywork done as well. When I walked into that space, she said, “Did you know about your tall white guardians?” I said I didn’t. She said I was followed by four very tall white Beings when I came into the room. She kept looking all the way up to the ceiling as if she couldn’t believe it herself. She didn’t know who they were either. But when she said so, some part of me knew.
I haven’t thought about them in years. Until this morning, as I watched Midas move around the yard. He is so quiet, only barks when he wants inside and even then, one bark. He whines but usually when he is uncomfortable for some reason. I get the sense being in a dog body is a weird space for him. You can see it in his eyes from time to time. And that flash came connecting the guardians to Midas. He is a guardian breed, hardwired to protect and watch over sheep in the mountains, independent of human involvement. A Great Pyranees blueprint. I had been feeling guilty because they need a job and there is no one to guard here. Besides, he loves everyone he meets.
But this morning it all made sense. His job is guarding me etherically. One of those Beings came through this creature last year when he was born. He has been sleeping on top of me every night, which is not always comfortable. But that’s his job. Sleep is when I do the most work in the ethers. His whining starts around 7 pm and doesn’t stop until I go to bed around 8. Then he feels settled and we sleep. He knows.
p.s. I’ve heard from a couple of you that the like button doesn’t work and someone mentioned the comments don’t work for them. I have no idea what’s going on but will investigate. xo
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