The Enormity

The Enormity


Do you feel it too?
This enormity of spirit swelling up inside you?
It’s almost too much to bear.

This wrenching away of all that is comfortable.
I feel like the sun is inside me, seeping through the cracks here and there.
And my chest is heaving from the weight of keeping it inside.

It’s the fear that keeps it in.
The fear of seeming too big for you.
The fear of what I am, what I am made of.
The fear of what my life will be if I believe it fully.

There is a great birth happening.
Like the spring, who teases with warmth one day
and breaks our bones with ice the next.
A rocky, rickety upward spiral of change.

We’re on a rollercoaster and we can see the top
and we are scared to death, but greatly anticipate the flight after the drop.

We are in labor
being washed over with peace and hope
and then racked with the pain of pushing out our greatness.

All those stories that lit you up as a child,
you know there is a kernel of truth in every story, right?

Our souls remember.

What if we are those stories?
People who have been told they are nothing.
Worth nothing, weak, broken, and doomed to fail.
But the reality is that we are magical beyond belief.
And ah, isn’t that always the way?

Just like in Narnia, we’ve been convinced there never was a sun.
We’re convinced magic is dead.

But deep inside, in the dark spaces of the night, we wonder.
And if we explore it, if we really give ourselves permission to be curious,
something astounding happens.

Right now, so many things are submerged.
But that doesn’t mean they don’t exist.
What if we are the sun?
What if we carry all the hope we’ve ever looked for?
What is we are the trees and the water and the stars?

Just imagine for a second that every thing you loathe about yourself,
is actually a superpower in disguise?
Can you imagine that your very power has been hiding
in the crevices of your hate?

Today, let’s take a look.
Question everything.
You’re not imagining this swelling of hope.
Dare to trust it. Maybe for the first time.

You’re being anointed.
Take a breath. Put your roots into the ground.
And let’s just both open our ribcages and let the sun out.

still working on the site shop (yes, I’m super slow these days)! Take a stroll through and see what you think! I’ve got some pretty fly smudge bundles made! And stuff if the bugs are biting the F out of you. 🙂

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